:: July 24th makes two years since I inked my contract ::
The girl who failed grade 11 and 12 English and dropped out of college now serves as a Senior Contributor at ForbesWomen. When I tell that story, most people immediately scratch their heads. Often times exchanging laughs as they make an attempt to visualize how in the world this dream of mine actually unfolded into something real.
I report to millennial women about the added value of mentorship, the power of the leapfrog theory and how to be the woman world-class performers actually want to mentor. Because nothing just happens. For many of my career wins, I’ve had to either pull all-nighters, pursue contacts, raise my hand in meetings when I was scared to speak up, book many flights I couldn’t afford just to meet the biggest players in my field or fail hard to earn the opportunities I wanted. There’s so much that goes on behind-the-scenes that you don’t see and most people won’t reveal. But I will. Here’s how I became a Senior Contributor at ForbesWomen.
A sacrifice is a loss or something you give up,
usually for the sake of a better cause.
1. I worked for it while I waited for it.
I’m not better than anyone, my focus is just different. I have an incredible amount of patience. It took me four years to pen my first book and twice as long to build a writing career I could eat from. I’m willing to make short-term sacrifices in exchange for long-term success and it’s never bothered me that things take time. Too many people want a promotion without having to endure the process. In my early 20s, I made the decision to give up weekends. That meant saying no to bae-cations, patio season, Cabana Pool Bar (still have never been), and any other cool things that young people do. I grinded in my 20s so I can live fly in my 30s and I am so happy I did. Here’s a quick timeline for you:
2010: Launched my blog
2011: Started my career as a nationally published journalist
2014: Released my novel, Everything I Couldn’t Tell My Mother
2017: Started my career as a ghostwriter for celebrities, pro athletes, and CEOs
2017: Became a Contributor to ForbesWomen
2018: Released my second book, Mixed Emotions
When I launched my blog it was nothing fancy (this site will show you the design archive of any site you’d like – pretty cool), but every single day I put my heart into it. I was consistently writing and doing all the correct things as I watched my peers surpass me in monthly page visits and views, recognition, and stardom. But I wasn’t in competition with anyone, I just wanted to be a better writer. For the first year, I might have totaled less than 100 views a month and I’m sure only a few friends and family members cared. However, Gary Vaynerchuk makes a great point when he says, “1 is greater than 0.” I never questioned if I’d become successful, but I won’t even lie I spent an enormous amount of time wondering when it would actually happen. Gradually, it came in the form of small wins that I learned to appreciate because I spent so many hours shooting in the gym. The point is to understand that many of the accomplishments we will experience today are the result of seeds we planted years ago.
[yotuwp type=”videos” id=”4fsYWXrGGcE” ]
2. You need a contact to get a contract
Early in my blogging career, I used my blog as a sounding board for my ideas and dreams. Then I started interviewing other women because I wanted to hear their stories too. What were their motivations? What kept them up at night? Did we share the same fears? Who were the members of their tribe? I followed my curiosity and used this series to strategically put me in a winning position. I emailed powerful women across various industries requesting interviews for my platform which also gave them a reason to open up to me. The key is to give, over deliver and use that as a foundation to build a genuine friendship onwards. One of my interviewees became a mentor and then that mentor became a client who later connected me to an editor at Forbes …which wasn’t handed to me btw, I had to earn my spot over many years.
3. I asked for what I wanted
This step is for women who have a real work ethic. I don’t want to leave you with the impression that you can ask for what you want anytime you want without actually putting in your 10,000 hours. That’s not how this works and there are many articles which advise you on your role and responsibility as a mentee – like this one. Once clear on your position, if you want an opportunity, you will have to ask for it. Don’t expect anyone to read your mind. After years of building a relationship with my mentor, I literally picked up the phone one day and asked her, “can you please help me become a writer for Forbes.com?” She said, “ok.” and we started the process. But even after that phone call, it still took another year before I closed the deal. You can listen to my podcast episode about my life-changing trip to New York that got the ball rolling.
4. Get in the right rooms with the right people
Each new level will require you to stretch yourself and sometimes that means jumping on a plane, train or automobile to get in the right space where other creators play. If I wanted to be a journalist, New York is where I needed to be and with every trip, I made new connections that moved the needle further ahead. I turned online strangers into real life friends. Powerful women I once admired are now people I confide in and do business with. Rhonesha Byng of Her Agenda, Alex Wolf, Ashley Fox, Charreah Jackson and more.
Strategically speaking, I needed to get in the same spaces as other Forbes contributors and editors. Once my mentor got me into these rooms, it was up to me to turn the lights on. You see, anyone can give you an opportunity, but it’s what you do with it that will determine how successful you are. If you’re not prepared, you’ll drop the ball.
5. Bring value to the conversation
Sitting in the same circles with female founders I admire is amazing but the real test was during my second trip to the Forbes office. After lunch, several ladies (co-working environment) started a round table discussion about some of the most talked about world issues. Of course, I was nervous. The whole time I thought “wtf am I really going to say?” but I had to quickly remind myself of one thing:
I was invited because I am a strong, intelligent woman who is worthy of this opportunity.
As the conversation continued, whenever I had the chance to raise my hand and speak up, I did. Girl, you have to speak up, even if your voice shakes. And my shit was crraaa-aaa-kinnnn, stttttt-uuuttttt-errrin and all kinds of ish. Anxiety almost got the best of me as I shared my own experiences and perspectives and did this all while my future editor looked on. She was sitting in our circle and leading the discussion. I had one opportunity to make a good first impression. At this point, I was not a Contributor yet so it was important to me that she knew that I had an opinion; a voice.
My friend Alex Wolf says, “You can’t be interesting if you’re not interested.” It’s so important to stay current. You need to know what’s going on in the world, your industry, and community. Pick up a book. Listen to a podcast. Open a newspaper. No excuses. There are so many ways to get in the game.
6. Know what you bring to the table
Every writer for the platform is an expert in a particular area. My area of expertise is mentorship. I’m the founder of New Girl on the Block, a community mentorship platform. My experience is in leadership and millennial engagement. I report on the added value of mentorship, the power of the leapfrog theory and how to become the woman world-class performers want to mentor.
Inspirational stories, personal development techniques, and career advice are way too broad. What the Forbes team is really looking for is a unique topic area and they also want to know what makes you uniquely qualified to write about it. There are thousands of people who want to write about the same thing. Which piece of it belongs to you and why?
7. Make shit happen.
I started writing for ForbesWomen in July 2017. One year and one month later, your girl was promoted to Senior Contributor. The company has 2300 writers in the media network and only the top 50 were able to attend an invite-only all-day brainstorm, Q&A, panel discussion and work session. I also had the opportunity to meet Malcolm Steve Forbes Jr. and the Chief Content Officer, Randall Lane, who called us (the 50 in the room) “the elite of the elite”. But I have to point out something: I was only one of two women of color. The other was my girl @werque_dominique. Though I am honored, it’s a reminder that there’s a lot of work to do and trust me, girlfriend, I am using my platform to hold the door wide open for you. Why do you think I fight so hard for my dreams? I’m not out here stuntin’ for nothin’. I do it all so I can show you what is possible. Stay the course. Anybody trying to bring you down first has to get on your level.