When was the last time you felt excited by your life?
When was the last time you flirted?
Asked for a raise?
Did something that scared you?
One of my superpowers is the ability to identify an opportunity where others see the impossible. By most people’s standards, I am not qualified to do any of the shit I do. However, that has never stopped me from pursuing my dreams and being great at my job. I have never been one to follow rules. The way I live my life is anything but linear. And even when I have been told I can’t do something, if my intuition leads me in the opposite direction, I do it anyway. But confidence doesn’t always mean fearless might I add. I am actually scared of many things like public speaking, raising my hand in rooms where I am the first.only.different, the dark, heights, anything that crawls, publishing my writing, producing video content for social media, wearing a bikini, negotiating business deals, and having tough conversations with my loved ones. The list goes on. I am sure you can relate to at least one item.
Over the years, I’ve practiced pushing through my discomfort to avoid being paralyzed by it. I started small and leveraged my corporate environment to help me become more resilient.
One of the bravest moments during my decade-long corporate career as an Executive Assistant will also go down as one of the scariest. During the tail end of my former life, I worked at a fashion retailer and in 2017, I sent an email to the head of internal communications with a request to schedule a 20-minute informational interview. I understood my current role inside out and was interested in recalculating my steps. While on the cusp of feeling stagnant, I reached out. The executive happily replied and followed through. Weeks later, we sat together in the lobby and to jumpstart the conversation I shared my writing background and expressed my desire to work in her department because I was certain I could add value to the team and also sharpen my skills as well. I needed a change. To no surprise, she was impressed and it’s safe to assume that the puzzled look that came over her was the result of learning that I was more than an assistant – happened every single time a piece of my other life was revealed to my coworkers. After asking her a series of intentional questions and catching a vibe, she then looked at me and made it clear that I wasn’t eligible for a role in the communications department because I didn’t have a degree.
I was crushed.
On paper, my accomplishments clearly indicated that I was running circles around everyone on her comms. team but because of a technicality, I wouldn’t stand a chance if I applied.
So I assessed the chess board, the players, the positioning, and recalculated my steps again.
Later that year, the co-president announced that she was launching a new initiative called Office Hours with the purpose of bridging the knowledge and communications gap between the executive team and thousands of employees. In effort to build a better working relationship between the two, the president opened her schedule for two hours every quarter and allowed anyone, no matter the level, to walk into her office to introduce themselves and or ask a specific question about their career growth.
I thought it was clever. Not many senior executives take the time and put in the extra effort, but our head office did and I knew I had to take advantage of this opportunity. The old saying goes, “put your head down and do the work.” “Let the work speak for itself,” they say. “Let your work be your billboard,” they preach. But I think the rules ought to be rewritten because I’ve never understood how you can put your head down and still have a keen understanding of the players on the board and when to make your next move.
According to psychologists at the University of Berkley in California, those who are overly confident and masters at self-promotion tend to trump those who simply get by on hard work alone. This means they are often promoted over those who may be more competent than themselves, as their bosses mistake their confidence for real talent.
Sheeeeit. Confidence often gets you in the door but your value add is what will keep you there. I don’t take my comms. meeting as a loss, it just wasn’t meant to be because a bigger opportunity was around the bend waiting for me.
And as Office Hours approached, I decided to raise my hand. I studied the co-president on a deeper level. I watched her videos, read her articles, educated myself with everything there was to know about her. When I walked into her office, hell yeah I was nervous, but I was equipped with the information I needed to hold my own. Here’s how it went:
ME: “[I said something I admired about her and then tied it in to a NY Times feature I previously read] I know for the past few years, you’ve delivered countless speeches, led panel discussions and executed amazing presentations.”
PREZ: She nodded her head.
ME: “WelI, outside of the office, I am a professional writer [I shared my background] with a genuine interest to work alongside you by ghostwriting some of your key messages. I’d like to take one more thing off your to-do list.”
PREZ: She sat straight up in her chair and smiled. Her response, “Interesting…”
We continued for nearly 15 minutes. I was very clear about the fact that the organization’s system was flawed and by overlooking someone like myself meant they must be dismissing talent in other areas of the company. Our meeting ended on a positive note. Immediately thereafter, she connected me via email to her publicist and days later, I was given my first assignment as the ghostwriter for the president.
It was a proud moment for me. I watched her take the stage at [confidential] College to give a commencement speech in front of thousands of graduates. It’s an exhilarating feeling hearing words that I wrote in partnership with a new client-partner. It was also a special day because she received an honorary doctorate. It was a clear sign that my talents will take me as far as I’d like them to.
I stepped forward because time and time again, this formula has worked for me. If you play in traffic you will be seen. If you raise your hand you will be heard, and if you produce outstanding work you will always be in demand. I have since moved on from the corporate world and launched a celebrity ghostwriting agency. I have never been happier to be living my dream and it all began with taking one shaky step forward.